[Casual_yet_trying]

. . . but not in rural CA!

For those attempting to enforce UK sensibilities in this matter, let me ask: Do you wear a dark suit for drinks at someone's country house? I stress "house" rather than "manor" here, as one assumes that everyone will change to more formal attire at the latter, à la "Gosford Park":wink2:

It's still a evening/night recption. I find it hard to believe any reception after 5pm to not require a nice sportcoat at the VERY least.

 

[Andy]

The definition of "Cocktail Attire" is not nebulous, but well defined:

DAY or EVENING INFORMAL (Don't think casual!) also COCKTAIL, or BUSINESS ATTIRE: This requires a business suit, necktie, lace-up shoes, and for evening occasions a non-button-down collar dress shirt. Make certain that the person sending out the invitations really means informal and not casual since this is a common misconception!
​

It's as JerseyJohn points out the confusion of the host that's the problem.

 

[Blueboy1938]

It's still a evening/night recption. I find it hard to believe any reception after 5pm to not require a nice sportcoat at the VERY least.

Yes, that is what I said in my previous post:tongue2:

My assumption is that OP's indication of a "3-day wedding" was to start off with a Friday evening "reception." There being no indication that it would be preceded by the actual marriage ceremony, the fact that it looks like it will be in the summer, or at least late spring, and is occurring in a VERY casual area in rural California, i. e., Napa Valley, the rigors of an urban sensibility are not appropriate. This is the wine country, folks, not the heart of the San Francisco financial district on a post-work Friday evening.

Obviously, the suggestions to contact the host are spot on. Maybe the plan IS for a swanky, pseudo-cosmopolitan ambiance all that way into the hinterland, but I seriously doubt it.

Cocktail attire in a city apartment or swank commercial venue: Dark suit, etc.

Cocktail attire at the yacht club: Blazer, slacks, open shirt, boat shoes sans socks.

Cocktail attire on a summery evening in rural Napa Valley: Light sport coat, dark(er) trousers, nice but casual leather, tie optional, summer colors - please:icon_headagainstwal

 

[Country Irish]

"I like the black leather part. Can the whip be in a contrasting color with studs? Must it be Jack boots or will black Chukkas suffice? "

Obviously you don't watch Late night tv. This is the appropriate leather attire (this only applies to Alex, not the OP-unless part of the party includes certain SFO night spots):

Istanbul

Leather Boy Raffle

 

[phyrpowr]

Wear a blazer. You ought to wear a necktie but you would probably be the only man there doing so if you did.

I would defer to Brother Will as to correct style in his neck of the woods (finished with some silk, of course)

 

[Checkerboard 13]

As Andy, GBR and others point out, "cocktail attire" is a very specific dress code. It is not some sort of flexible assumption that can vary with the locale, venue, etc.
As also previously pointed out, the host's understanding of what cocktail attire is may or may not be correct. This can (and often does) cause confusion.

One would hope, though, that someone planning a three-day wedding, and who specified "cocktail attire" on the invitations would either already have knowledge of what the term entails, or would have taken the time to confirm its meaning.
Usually a wedding of this nature is a carefully planned affair, and not something put together willy-nilly, without thought.

Also, the Napa Valley is not exactly "farm country." While it is indeed an agricultural area, some of the world's finest wines are grown there, it is home to top-level restaurants and it hosts very sophisticated gatherings. An elaborate wedding (three days, mind you) in the Napa Valley should not be considered an invitation to bumpkin-land!

 

[JustJosh]

My wife tends to use the term "Cocktail Attire" when writing invitations for after dusk adult parties (mind out of the gutter boys!)
Ladies wear sexy cocktail type dresses, and men wear more fashion forward ensembles, sport coats, relaxed open collars, no ties usually.

 

[Canadian]

My girlfriend and I use the term when throwing a party where ties or jackets are expected, but not to the degree that one needs to purchase a new tuxedo. Of course, we're weird and have things like "white tie parties" and sometimes we "dress for dinner".

Thomas

 

[Blueboy1938]

As Andy, GBR and others point out, "cocktail attire" is a very specific dress code. It is not some sort of flexible assumption that can vary with the locale, venue, etc.
As also previously pointed out, the host's understanding of what cocktail attire is may or may not be correct. This can (and often does) cause confusion.

One would hope, though, that someone planning a three-day wedding, and who specified "cocktail attire" on the invitations would either already have knowledge of what the term entails, or would have taken the time to confirm its meaning.
Usually a wedding of this nature is a carefully planned affair, and not something put together willy-nilly, without thought.

Here is a cocktail event at the French Laundry in Yountville, arguably one of the premier restaurants in that area. Naturally, I have no idea what, if anything, the invitations said, but this is what real people wear there:

Also, the Napa Valley is not exactly "farm country." While it is indeed an agricultural area, some of the world's finest wines are grown there, it is home to top-level restaurants and it hosts very sophisticated gatherings. An elaborate wedding (three days, mind you) in the Napa Valley should not be considered an invitation to bumpkin-land!

Precisely because the urban standard for cocktail attire is potentially at odds with the locale, contacting the host is vital. Going with the conventional interpretation of "cocktail attire" is a dangerous game in this case.

The implication that "bumpkinland" was implied is misconstrued. I have been to cocktail receptions in Napa Valley, and a nice sport coat is what the gentry there wear to such an event, it was my observation.

Here is a cocktail event at the French Laundry, arguably one of the premier restaurants in that area. Naturally, I have no idea what, if anything, the invitation said, but this is what real people wear there:

Shot at 2010-05-31

 

[Apatheticviews]

Excluding actually reading the Homepage

If I saw "Cocktail Attire" I would assume ladies to wear a Cocktail dress, and men to be dressed to similar standard. The scene from Pretty Woman showing Julia Roberts in cocktail dress, and Richard Gere in business suit strikes he as exactly appropriate.

 

[medhat]

I'd propose that the phrase, instead of specifying a type or style of dress, in this day and age more suggests an attitude of "upscale fun". So no, it's probably not going to be shorts, flip-flops and a t-shirt, by nearly anyone's standards. On the other end of the spectrum, it's not black tie either. How would I interpret this in Napa? 1) no tie. 2) a suit would be acceptable, but probably not the norm (I'd be wearing grey glen plaid, but that's a midwestern perspective), 3) a sportcoat/blazer would probably be fine, assuming you could be casual/fun in it, 4) any reasonable coordinating shoes should be fine. Above all, it's being relaxed and sociable at the event that counts, and that will trump whatever you're wearing.

 

[treydog999]

I generally assume it means dark suit with a tie.

I have also recently received an invitation to attend a party at a social club with the same dress code. I am planning on wearing a dark suit and tie. I cant really speak to napa valley. Being a Midwesterner i have only been to California once.

 

[Bog]

Excluding actually reading the Homepage

If I saw "Cocktail Attire" I would assume ladies to wear a Cocktail dress, and men to be dressed to similar standard. The scene from Pretty Woman showing Julia Roberts in cocktail dress, and Richard Gere in business suit strikes he as exactly appropriate.

The problem here is that a cocktail dress matches with a dinner jacket in formality, not with a suit. Furthermore, it is traditional to specify the male dress code, rather than the female: black tie, white tie, dress informal, etc. all refer to mens' clothing, and women match their outfits. Specifying coctail dress implies that women will be in a specific type of dress: a coctail dress, and that men have to conform their outfits to match.

 

[Checkerboard 13]

It is quite interesting to see the amount of confusion about the meaning of the term "cocktail attire" amongst members of this board, all of whom (one would presume) share a high interest in clothing. From this alone, one can imagine the befuddlement of the general public on the subject.

As I noted earlier, "cocktail attire" is a dress code, much the same as "black tie" and "white tie" are dress codes. It can be considered equivalent to "informal" attire (which unfortunately confuses many people even more than cocktail attire, with many mistakenly assuming it to mean "casual.")

Cocktail attire is generally considered to mean dark suit for men and a cocktail dress for women.
And contrary to what one might think, cocktail attire is not restricted only to cocktail parties, nor is it called such because of women's cocktail dresses.

As with any dress code, it is not open to interpretation. It does allow some latitude, in that a dark suit can be other than black, and the necktie color is open (within reason) but the mere fact that so many people are confused about the meaning of the term does and often dress improperly does not change its definition.
One can easily find people improperly dressed at any type of function. Most all of us have probably seen some unfortunately creative interpretations of black tie, for instance, but that does not suddenly cause us to redefine the term!

 

[Bog]

The following are dress codes:

CASUAL
sportswear

INFORMAL
suits or blazers

SEMI-FORMAL
black tie

FORMAL
white tie

The following are styles of dress:

Creative Attire, Festive Dress, Party Dress, Cocktail Dress, Fancy Dress, etc.

Each of the styles can be FORMAL, SEMI-FORMAL, INFORMAL, or CASUAL, depending on the circumstances.

Writing "Cocktail Dress" on an invitation gives no clue as to the formality of the event, hence the confusion.

Some people take cocktails in their shorts, others in black tie. Both would be dressed in cocktail attire correctly, depending on the formality of the occasion.

When an invitation specifies only a style of dress, but not the formality, it might as well say nothing at all.

The correct invitation invites people to an event, say: for Cocktails and then specifies the formality in the dress code: Dress Informal.

Invitations that specify only a style but not a formality assume that the attendee knows what is expected.

And contrary to what one might think, cocktail attire is not restricted only to cocktail parties, nor is it called such because of women's cocktail dresses.

Since there is no article of dress named "cocktail" in mens dress, but there is a specific item called a "cocktail dress" for women, it follows that it is named after the women's article.

It can be considered equivalent to "informal" attire

What you mean is that it is equivalent to "dress informal". However, "dress informal" does not include the wearing of "cocktail dresses" by ladies.

 

[Checkerboard 13]

Precisely because the urban standard for cocktail attire is potentially at odds with the locale, contacting the host is vital. Going with the conventional interpretation of "cocktail attire" is a dangerous game in this case.

The implication that "bumpkinland" was implied is misconstrued. I have been to cocktail receptions in Napa Valley, and a nice sport coat is what the gentry there wear to such an event, it was my observation.

Here is a cocktail event at the French Laundry, arguably one of the premier restaurants in that area. Naturally, I have no idea what, if anything, the invitation said, but this is what real people wear there:

Shot at 2010-05-31

I agree that it would be wise to contact the host, but not at all because there is some sort of varying standard for cocktail attire. It is a definite dress code, whether one is in the city, suburbs, countryside, or wherever. Dress codes do not fundamentally change depending on the locale. For instance, "black tie" would not mean a leather vest and black bolo if one were in the southwest.

Of course events requiring various dress codes may be more or less common, depending upon the location. One might presume, for instance, that it would be far more likely to be invited to several black tie events a year if one lived in Manhattan, than if one lived in Bozeman.
That does not mean that black tie (or cocktail attire) events require different attire in Bozeman than in Manhattan. It simply means that that particular attire is likely to be called for less frequently, and more often a more casual attire specified (or presumed.)

The photo you posted shows a group of people who (almost to a person) are wearing casual attire. The use of this photo to attempt to define cocktail attire is, unfortunately, terribly misleading.
To begin with, you yourself state that you have "no idea" what, if any' attire was specified on the invitation. That alone would render the photo useless as an example.
Even if we were to have a copy of an invitation to this event, and it clearly stated "cocktail attire," the only conclusion we could draw would be that the majority of the people in the photo are inappropriately dressed.
And of course merely because an event is a cocktail party, one can not presume that cocktail attire will be specified ...nor does it mean that whatever happens to be worn at it is automatically "cocktail attire." (By the way, I do not believe I see any cocktails in that photo, though there are a few glasses of wine visible.)

Were I to hold a daytime, outdoor event in the Napa Valley, I would very likely specify casual attire, especially if it were on or adjacent to a lawn. Perhaps if it were a late afternoon event, held in the courtyard of a winery or manor, cocktail attire would be appropriate.

I would also caution anyone to not base their attire for a wedding in the Napa Valley upon what the local population generally wears. Unless all in attendance are local, very few will be likely to know or care about local dress norms... and ... it's a wedding, which (unfortunately) is one of the few remaining occasions that many people ever bother to dress for.

The event the OP was invited to is a night time reception, which is part of a three day wedding, and for which cocktail attire was specified. He asked exactly what that means. I, Andy, and others have given the correct and exact meaning. You serve only to mislead him with your presumptions which are based upon inexact notions.
You are correct, as I mentioned previously, that it would be valuable to contact the host. The reason for doing so would not be because cocktail attire has various meanings, but to confirm that the host is indeed using the term in its correct definition.

 

[Bog]

For what it is worth, wiki forwards Cocktail attire to Semi-formal, meaning that cocktail attire really means black tie. :idea:

Although elsewhere, cocktail dress is grouped as part of a range of casual dress:

Casual codes

The less formal dress codes are more fluid. Their definition varies geographically and may include:
Smart casual (or traditional casual, [old fashioned] business casual, [new] cocktail, executive casual, corporate casual)
Business casual (or 'dressy', resort casual, country club, casual chic, semi-casual, neat casual)
Leisure attire (or Saturday casual)
Active attire
The term casual describes a wide variety of clothing, ranging from smart casual to active attire.

)

Also, most etiquette books advise that dress codes are not set in stone, but are only as for the pleasure of the society one interacts with.

 

[Trimmer]

In these parts 'Cocktails' always meant a time: 6pm (five minutes earlier would be absurd; five minutes later would be preposterous - who said that, I forget?). It therefore implied Black Tie, the assumption being you were going on to dinner (elsewhere) afterwards rather than home again. In other words you wore for cocktails what you wore for dinner and there would be no need to specify a dress 'code'.

That probably doesn't help at all in this case.

 

[Checkerboard 13]

Since there is no article of dress named "cocktail" in mens dress, but there is a specific item called a "cocktail dress" for women, it follows that it is named after the women's article.

Now that is sheer and utter nonsense! Using your logic, women might then be wearing dresses made of a rooster's feathers.
Cocktail attire is not named after an article of dress. It is one name for a particular dress code.

What you mean is that it is equivalent to "dress informal". However, "dress informal" does not include the wearing of "cocktail dresses" by ladies.

Unless you are in my head (which I can assure you that both you and I may be eternally grateful that you are not) you do not know what I mean.

Please do not take my word on the matter, though. I would entreat you to consider the thoughts of another:

"DAY or EVENING INFORMAL (Don't think casual!) also COCKTAIL, or BUSINESS ATTIRE: This requires a business suit, necktie, lace-up shoes, and for evening occasions a non-button-down collar dress shirt. Make certain that the person sending out the invitations really means informal and not casual since this is a common misconception!"

Considering the source: one could almost hope that you might have come across this information previously!

 

[Tim Correll]

Cocktail attire means, for the male, suit and tie. A navy suit, dark tie and black leather would be appropriate.

There is no dress code for wine tasting. If you going on a tour of local wineries for the tasting wear what is appropriate for the group.

A charcoal suit is just as appropriate as a navy suit for cocktail attire.