Wear a suit. End of story!

On a personal note, I hope that for the sake of you and your wife, the proceedings go forward without incident and both of you are able to move forward with the next chapter of your lives. Good luck!

 

Wear a suit. End of story!

Absolutely. No question.

 

Suit or sport coat is best. I worked in a courtroom during law school and I'd be lucky to see someone with pants (instead of shorts or yoga pants) and a shirt that didn't have ridiculous language on it ("fu*k the police" was a shirt I saw).

As long as you have a suit on you can't go wrong. I think tie without a jacket looks too much like a salesman.


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Wear a suit...just not a fancy one. You don't want to look like you're made of money in that case.

 

I'm sorry to hear about your trouble, GC. Wearing a suit will do you no harm.

 

Perhaps it's only in my neck of the woods, but my limited exposure to judges suggests that they can be odd ducks, and trying to guess what a judge will or won't think without some knowledge of that individual is wasted effort. I agree, wear a suit, but very, very low key.

Another thought is that if you are represented by council in the matter, you could ask your attorney for their opinion on the issue.

I too am sorry for your difficulty.

 

When my day comes, I'm wearing a suit.

 

This topic has been done and done and done over again. Here's what you should do.

Dress like the man you are. If you're a plumber, wear khakis and a polo shirt. If you're a banker, wear a suit. If you are a university professor, wear a tweed sport coat and bow tie. If you never wear suits in real life and don't hold a job where a suit is expected, you aren't going to fool anyone. In fact, it will likely backfire. I'm in courthouses on a fairly regular basis and see everything from bespoke to pajamas, which is to be expected because courts are the crossroads of real life. And what you wear will matter only incrementally, if at all. Judges, at least where I live, aren't the world's snazziest dressers, and they don't have to be, robes being what they are. Wear what makes you comfortable, so long as it's not shorts and a t-shirt, and don't obsess. You have a lot more to worry about than attire, especially if a jury isn't involved.

 

In my experience, when a witness or litigant attends court in a suit, it is generally perceived as a sign of respect. Wear one, and let the slobs do as they please. If you want to tone it down a notch, a blazer, dress trousers and open collar shirt will serve nearly as well.

Flanderian makes a good point about checking with your lawyer about the best local practice for your particular region and level of court.

 

Be an adult and wear a suit. It does not matter that some people don't know how to dress or think that appearing at a formal occasion is the same as going to the gym or to the super market. If you are not that type of person, don't dress like that type of person.

 

In my experience, when a witness or litigant attends court in a suit, it is generally perceived as a sign of respect. Wear one, and let the slobs do as they please. If you want to tone it down a notch, a blazer, dress trousers and open collar shirt will serve nearly as well.

Flanderian makes a good point about checking with your lawyer about the best local practice for your particular region and level of court.

Forgive my ignorance but doesn't the court setting also dictate the formality of dress? For example, if one were to attend a trial then a suit is a no brainer. But I'll be attending a hearing, which to my understanding, is informal. It will likely only last 20 to 30 minutes at best. In this scenario would dress slacks, collared shirt/tie, and blazer be acceptable? I'll probably wear a suit regardless, just curious if there are exceptions

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I once found myself in your exact circumstances and I wore a suit and tie to the hearing.

Actually, there's very good advice in this thread. Roger (also a lawyer) is absolutely right that wearing a suit (or sports coat/blazer and tie) is a sign respect. Having said this, RR32 makes a very pragmatic point: if your situation in life is such that you would not normally wear a suit or sports coat/blazer on a regular basis, it might be perceived a over doing it.

Your lawyer will give you the best advice based on regional practices.

I wish you the best of luck in resolving this most stressful and difficult situation.

 

Is a judge going to be deciding this case or a jury? If it's the former, then there's no difference between the trial, should it come to that, and a pre-trial hearing or proceeding.

Judges see lots of people every day from all walks of life. Of course you shouldn't dress like a slob, but the best judges can be very astute at spotting phonies who overdress for court. I don't mean to shout this, but I'll say it again: Dress as the person you are. When I go to court, I wear a suit or nice trousers and sport coat with tie. That's the same thing I wear when I go to the library or city hall or most anywhere else I go during my work day. What you wear, presuming it's not a t-shirt and jeans, just isn't going to matter in terms of the outcome of your case, and that's what should be most important. Good luck on your case.

Forgive my ignorance but doesn't the court setting also dictate the formality of dress? For example, if one were to attend a trial then a suit is a no brainer. But I'll be attending a hearing, which to my understanding, is informal. It will likely only last 20 to 30 minutes at best. In this scenario would dress slacks, collared shirt/tie, and blazer be acceptable? I'll probably wear a suit regardless, just curious if there are exceptions

Sent from my tinfoil hat

 

Forgive my ignorance but doesn't the court setting also dictate the formality of dress? For example, if one were to attend a trial then a suit is a no brainer. But I'll be attending a hearing, which to my understanding, is informal. It will likely only last 20 to 30 minutes at best. In this scenario would dress slacks, collared shirt/tie, and blazer be acceptable? I'll probably wear a suit regardless, just curious if there are exceptions

Sent from my tinfoil hat

For me, 'court' means there is a judge presiding. If that is the case, my recommendation stands. If the hearing is something in the nature of a non-judicial mediation, then less formal may be more okay.

 

Oh! That kind of court.
I was going to ask if someone was being presented at a royal court, oh, well, here it is anyway:
www.archive.org/stream/dressinsigniawor00greauoft#page/28/mode/2up

 

This isn't a case. There is no jury. It's a hearing.

Many hearings aren't in front of judges in family type courts. It's typically an attorney referee, or some other form of mediating attorney.


Suit is fine, sport coat is fine. Anything remotely professional is fine.

 

Every hearing I've ever attended involved a judge, be it an administrative law judge or a hearing officer or an actual judge. Someone, in short, who has the power to make a decision. If a family law matter is in court, that's generally a sign that the parties aren't agreeing on something and so need a judge--a real judge who wears robes--to decide the matter. The OP hasn't given us enough information to go on, but that's what it sounds like. And family law matters are almost never decided by juries. Hearings are serious matters. Lots and lots of trials are won or lost in pre-trial hearings.

This isn't a case. There is no jury. It's a hearing.

Many hearings aren't in front of judges in family type courts. It's typically an attorney referee, or some other form of mediating attorney.

Suit is fine, sport coat is fine. Anything remotely professional is fine.

 

All good recommendations here. I'd like to echo SG's advice above: I hope you and your wife can amicably move forward to your respective next chapters.

 

The only thing I would add is that if the hearing is one that could potentially influence finances, a suit may subconsciously influence the judge as to how much you can afford. I suppose I'd keep it extremely conservative and forego any pocket squares, cufflinks, etc...that would scream dandy or rich, but I suppose this definition changes based on region.

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Oh! That kind of court.
I was going to ask if someone was being presented at a royal court, oh, well, here it is anyway:
www.archive.org/stream/dressinsigniawor00greauoft#page/28/mode/2up

Interesting source. Just in case the need arises, I wonder where does one buy a pair of white dogskin gloves these days?

 

Interesting source. Just in case the need arises, I wonder where does one buy a pair of white dogskin gloves these days?

Hmm, your best bet might be to keep an eye out for local mutts.
The more I look at that book the more i think it might me material for a brand new thread. There's an advertisement for Hawkes & Co and an example of their work on the first colored plate.

 

Hmm, your best bet might be to keep an eye out for local mutts.
The more I look at that book the more i think it might me material for a brand new thread. There's an advertisement for Hawkes & Co and an example of their work on the first colored plate.

There's a line in 'Withnail and I' about Hawkes ('...This suit was cut by Hawkes of Savile Row. Just because the only tailoring you've got is above your appendix...').

 

Thieves and Sharks.

 

The only thing I would add is that if the hearing is one that could potentially influence finances, a suit may subconsciously influence the judge as to how much you can afford. I suppose I'd keep it extremely conservative and forego any pocket squares, cufflinks, etc...that would scream dandy or rich, but I suppose this definition changes based on region.

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This makes very good sense. It resonates with something discussed by a jury consultant when I was involved in a civil suit as an expert witness. She discussed appearance at a level of detail and subtlety that was educational and, in the event, effective.

 

In my experience, when a witness or litigant attends court in a suit, it is generally perceived as a sign of respect. Wear one, and let the slobs do as they please. If you want to tone it down a notch, a blazer, dress trousers and open collar shirt will serve nearly as well.

Flanderian makes a good point about checking with your lawyer about the best local practice for your particular region and level of court.

I have always worn a suit, though a few times, shirt, tie, sports coat, particularly after seeing attorneys wearing birkenstock sandals in court here!
If dress and appearance suggest respect for the court, which I believe, what is the message some give in wearing slovenly t-shirts, and casual attire?

Stay with the suit.

I hope things go gently for both of you. It is never easy.