[remotestreet]

I just started a job wearing where on some days I have to wear a suit/tie, and on the other days I can be more casual with just slacks/dress shirt/tie (it's at a law firm, but I am just the videographer, working in marketing/advertising).

I hate how my tie flops around, especially at lunch. Are you generally suppose to wear a tie clip with it? Nobody else at the office does and especially since I am not a fancy lawyer I don't want to super stand out.

What's the protocol for the tie while eating?

I also feel my tie is just constantly coming loose and undone and I am constantly having to adjust it. I've been tying a half windsor knot after watching a bunch of youtube videos. I am pretty slow and terrible at it, but is there a better knot that stays in place?

 

[Peak and Pine]

Others can address the knot. But to keep both blades in place as well as tight to the shirt, a tack is the way to go, worn low on the tie.

It's a tiny piece of jewelry, usually round, the diameter of a pencil eraser, with a very sharp needle attacked to the rear. The needle goes through tie, back blade and can go clear through to the shirt, and then is capped by a metal piece that comes with the tack.

You will find that some object to tacks because they punch a (very small) hole in the tie. And they do. But so do working buttons for buttons need a corresponding hole in order to function. And nobody objects to those. With a tie, you just make sure the tack always goes through the first hole you punched, and you must always wear that tie with a tack, or a bar, both of which fill/cover the tiny hole.

Most tacks come with a tiny chain attached to the rear. This goes through a button hole on the shirt and allows a modicum of movement to the tie.

 

[Flanderian]

I just started a job wearing where on some days I have to wear a suit/tie, and on the other days I can be more casual with just slacks/dress shirt/tie (it's at a law firm, but I am just the videographer, working in marketing/advertising).

I hate how my tie flops around, especially at lunch. Are you generally suppose to wear a tie clip with it? Nobody else at the office does and especially since I am not a fancy lawyer I don't want to super stand out.

What's the protocol for the tie while eating?

I also feel my tie is just constantly coming loose and undone and I am constantly having to adjust it. I've been tying a half windsor knot after watching a bunch of youtube videos. I am pretty slow and terrible at it, but is there a better knot that stays in place?

Most ties have a "tie keeper" or store label in the back into which you can tuck the small end of the tie, thereby having just one dangle. But if it's any dangle that disturbs you, by all means wear a tie clip to hold it in place as you evidently prefer. It happens to not currently be common, but there's absolutely no protocol that disallows it.

If you're like me, the protocol for a tie when eating is to drop something gooey and indelible on it. But only if it's brand new and costly! But seriously, I would typically try to just keep it out of the way, and if I felt that was beyond my abilities, I'd tuck a napkin into the neck of my shirt and allow it to drape the front of my shirt and tie.

I most often wore a half-Windsor and had few problems with it. Keep working with it, and you'll get better at it. You might try knotting it a little more snuggly too. It's common for your tie to loosen a bit during the day, and there's nothing wrong with snugging it back in place when needed.

A thought . . . . not that I'm accusing you of being a cheap-skate, but supper cheap ties made of slippery plastics might contribute to what you describe. Silk, wool or cotton tend to knot securely.

 

[Matt S]

I haven't use it, but a friend gave me something called The Tie Thing. It works like a tie bar but isn't as showy. If the button spacing on your shirt is much different than that of The Tie Thing, it might not work as well.

The Tie Thing Men's Necktie Accessory Tie Holder (3 Pieces, White)

Buy The Tie Thing Men's Necktie Accessory Tie Holder (3 Pieces, White) at Amazon. Customer reviews and photos may be available to help you make the right purchase decision!

www.amazon.com

 

[StephenRG]

The standard trick depending on where you're lunching is to open a button in your shirt and tuck the tie inside the shirt front. Also, do not order ramen when you're wearing a suit or a nice shirt,

 

[Flanderian]

I have one tie clasp, though as mentioned, I don't wear them anymore, or ties much either due to circumstances.

But the one I have is an Art Deco repop of very simple design, and that is what I prefer. Though perhaps not Art Deco, the one below is from The Bay, and an example of the simple aesthetic I prefer.

 

[Flanderian]

The standard trick depending on where you're lunching is to open a button in your shirt and tuck the tie inside the shirt front. Also, do not order ramen when you're wearing a suit or a nice shirt,

I find that either marinara or something gooey with cheese usually works best.

 

[Peak and Pine]

Not to be too snooty, but tucking a napkin into your shirt collar or tucking the tie inside your shirt would seem to accompany the act of holding a knife in one hand, a fork in the other, holding both upright and tapping the handle ends on the table while waiting to be served. Very early frontier. How about just sitting and consuming in a manner that doesn't have you slopping food all over yourself.

 

[Peak and Pine]

I have one tie clasp, though as mentioned, I don't wear them anymore, or ties much either due to circumstances.

But the one I have is an Art Deco repop of very simple design, and that is what I prefer. Though perhaps not Art Deco, the one below is from The Bay, and an example of the simple aesthetic I prefer.


View attachment 83880

^^ Very nice.

One of mine, shown here last December...

 

[Vecchio Vespa]

If you plan to eat soup, spaghetti, or anything other than a fairly dry sandwich or a salad with no dressing, take a bow tie with you to work. Put it on for lunch. I remember when an Hermes tie was $75, and this was the best way to avoid having a $90 bowl of French onion soup.

 

[jackmccullough]

I wear a tie clasp. I only wear a tie when I'm going to court, to the Legislature or some other relatively formal meeting, or to a social event when a jacket and tie are required. I know there are guys who don't seem to mind having their ties flop around, but it bugs me, so I pretty much wear a tie clasp every time I wear a tie. I only have one; my wife got it for me and had it monogrammed with my initials.

A couple of other options for you are a bow tie or a v-neck sweater or sleeveless sweater. You get the formality upgrade that come from wearing a tie without the flopping effect.

 

[Charles Dana]

Secure the tie to your shirt placket with a simple tie clip. Put the clip no higher than a couple of inches above your belt line—not at the middle of your sternum. Nobody at the office will care.

And there’s no necktie “protocol” for when you’re eating. Eat carefully, that’s all. Also, avoid soup, spaghetti, tacos, and burritos that are as big as pillows. If you can’t resist those foods—and I don’t blame you if you can’t—lean in and eat extra slowly.

 

[fishertw]

I once saw a guy take his tie and flip it back over his shoulder to eat lunch. Had never seen that before.

 

[StephenRG]

I once saw a guy take his tie and flip it back over his shoulder to eat lunch. Had never seen that before.

I've not infrequently seen that, particularly if it's an Hermes tie.

 

[Oldsarge]

The Tie Thing works a treat. I own no tie clips but have an assortment of Tie Things to match all my dress shirts in the warmer months. When it's cold, I wear a three piece suit and the vest solves any problems of dangling necktie. Bow ties are also an excellent idea and the OP being a videographer is a sufficiently "creative type" by profession that a touch of eccentricity is only to be expected, even by snooty lawyers.

 

[challer]

I once saw a guy take his tie and flip it back over his shoulder to eat lunch. Had never seen that before.

I saw a lot of engineers do this back in the day. For me, the proper method is the military tie tuck.

 

[some_dude]

I don't have much of a problem with my tie when I am sitting down to eat, so I guess maybe I don't understand the question?

Where it can be a problem is on a windy day, with your jacket unbuttoned, or no jacket at all. I generally keep my jacket buttoned these days, when outside or standing up, so not a big issue for me, but in my younger days it could be.

A trick I learned, and I'm sure the forum will frown on this, is to slip a paper clip lengthwise into the store label on the back of the tie (where the small end tucks in), and then use the paper clip to attach the tie to your shirt. Okay, it won't work in hurricane force winds, but it does work most of the time, and as far as anyone can tell, your tie is just doing a good job of staying in place.

 

[triklops55]

If you just started wearing ties, I can understand why you are having some difficulties. One of the tricks to wearing a tie is to wear it as effortlessly as you wear any other garment. So you will have to learn to eat without spilling when wearing a tie; it's not a difficult thing to do, you just have to remember that you're wearing a tie and be a little more careful. Use the keeper to keep both ends together, and perhaps tuck the tie into your shirt while you eat, if you must. I generally don't tie a napkin around my neck when eating, except if I'm eating something that may splatter, such as spaghetti.

It's an OK practice to tuck your tie into the waist of your pants as well, if it flopping around bugs you. Knick knacks really aren't necessary to keep your tie in place.

As for the knot, you'll have to tie a tighter knot so it doesn't come loose. I don't mean to tie it tighter around your neck, but make sure the knot itself is tight. The other poster might be correct in that your ties might be the problem. A good tie will generally maintain a nice, tight knot. Polyester ties not so much.

I have a feeling that since you are new to tie wearing, it might cause you to focus on it more. The more you wear one, the less of your attention it will draw.

 

[jc1305us]

I once saw a guy take his tie and flip it back over his shoulder to eat lunch. Had never seen that before.

I do that. But then again I’m notorious for getting food on my shirt when I’m not wearing a tie.

 

[Vecchio Vespa]

As I have reread this thread, there seem to be two very different issues: managing an unruly tie and avoiding meal time spillage on the tie. As to the first, buy high quality ties of natural materials like silk, cotton, wool, etc. and tie neat fairly tight knots. They ought to hold. With a secure tie on you can embrace full blown sprezzatura or get progressively more orderly through using the keeper, or using a clip or tack. As to the second, for a four in hand tie, the military tuck seems the most civilized, but that may be me, channeling the Navy.