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Portly, uh...Fat, uh...Big Guys' Thread

90K views 215 replies 56 participants last post by  zblaesi 
#1 ·
If you don't want to read a thread for us portly gentlemen, then go ahead back to the main forum screen and read the multiple theads about "fitted shirts", and "skinny jeans".

Otherwise, here goes...

You should know this about me. I am a portly guy and have been since I stopped playing football after college. I have always worked out, and still do, strenuously, I might add. I consider what I eat before I eat it, and do take steps to eat a healthy diet, although I will also inhale a big red juicy steak now and again. I am just big. I have a big frame, with braod shoulders, big chest, big butt and big thighs, and I always have. Now that I am about to hit the age of 50, I am the owner of a big gut too. That part has been growing for the past 20 years. I am comfortable with who I am, and while I do continue to take steps to keep things under control, I am resigned to the fact that I will be a fat guy for the remainder of my life.
No problem...It's a fact.

So with a 56'' chest, and a 50'' waist, I turned to the "big guy's stores" decades ago and have had suits, shirts, sport coats, and dress slacks, made to measure for years. I have used quite a few MTM brands over the years including Joe Banks, Palm Beach, HS&M, Tallia, and Jack Victor, to name a few. Currently I find myself using Tom James quite a bit, which I like (in spite of the rather rough treatment TJ gets on many threads in this forum). Admittedly, I had to find the right "consultant" from TJ to get things right, and I do buy from their high end lines (Ventura, Sartoria, and H&S Bespoke), and, yes, there is a price premium for the at home or in the office service, but I am a busy guy, and I do appreciate them coming to me, and their service is second to none.

All that said, the purpose of this thread is to get a discussion going among those of us that are horizontally challenged, about what we wear, how we wear it, what issues of fit and style are particular to us, and what are good sources of clothes and accessories for us well-rounded fellows. Also what common info. is out there that is just plain wrong. Things like fat guys should not cuff their pants, or wear hats, are just silly notions. I do both, and both add to my look in a very positive way. I even occasionally tie a bowtie around my 20" neck, and it sits proudly under my double chin in a very Churchillian way.

Clearly I am a clothes hound. I love fine cloth and classic styles, but it is also nice to be able to purchase more casual clothes and accessories off the rack. So here are some questions and thoughts:

Casual Cotton Trousers: I like Savane with pleats and cuffs. What other suggestions are there?

Jeans: Levi 501's relaxed fit. Have not found a good brand of dressier jeans that fit; any ideas?

Sport Shirts: Joe Banks has some, as do Paul Frederick, and RL/Polo, but I have not found a really good selection, so I usually have these made by TJ.

Knit Shirts: RL/Polo has lots of solid colors in 3XB, but watch the horizontal stripes and bright colors, fellas. I also like Axis, Cutter& Buck.

Belts: Trafalger, I have also had a few special made by AE to match my AE shoes. I ordered the AE belts through TJ, though, and probably paid a big mark up. Has anyone found a way to order custom (Big) sized belts directly from AE on line? Any other suggestion for belts?

Long Ties: Extra long ties from PF, also Trafalger, JB and some made to order from TJ (ouch expensive). Any other ideas?

Wide Shoes: Mainly AE, some from J&M.

Casual Coats: Claiborne

Over Coats: Made to measure from Cardinal of Canada.

Scarves: Anybody found a source of extra long cashmere scarves?

PJ's and Robes: Rochester Clothing's (on-line) own brand.

Underwear: Big selection at Rochester Clothing (on line).

Beachwear: RL/Polo, Tommy Bahama.

Best On-line stores for Big Guys: Dann On-line, Rochestor Clothing, Westport, PF (shirts), JB (shirts).

Best brick and mortor Big Guys store: Austins (Timonium, MD and Fairfax, VA)

Calling all big guy clothiers...Please respond with web addresses, addresses and information.

Big guys: please share particular clothing problems/ issues/ questions.

Thanks fellas...be big, be bold, be confident!!!
 
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#27 ·
Example of Well Tailored Suit

Follow this link and look at April 28. The picture is an example of using many design elements to create a very clean look on a large man.

https://thesartorialist.blogspot.com/2006_04_01_archive.html

Obviously, this gentleman had his suit made for him. Some of the design elements can be achieve with MTM. See my previous post. Also, the size of the trouser leg at the ankle is larger than you might see on OTR trousers. This provides a better look.
 
#29 ·
6'4", 250lbs, trying to lose more. I've recently bought a 48L blazer and I buy 17.5x36 shirts. I've ALWAYS worn my pants such that my belly hangs over. Right now, a 39" waist would be best because a 40" drops and the pockets on a 38 kinda push out.

Honestly, I don't think any clothes that I've bought look great on my because of the pants and the belly. I find stuff that looks acceptable on me by buying tall sized shirts. My work wear on is on the casual side of business casual (I'm an IT guy working for a medical equipment company), but I still like to look decent.

I don't own wool trousers, but I've noticed the wrinkling across the front of my "well fitting" 40" cotton pants. I've dropped 50 pounds over the past couple years and have really noticed that clothes look better on me. I'm convinced that getting rid of my belly will greatly help me out. Yes, knees hurt when I run. Elliptical machine has been feeling better to me recently.
 
#30 ·
Bears of the World Unite!

I'm a self-identified "bear", and quite proud of it. The "Minotaur" moniker only refers to being half man and half beast (you DO NOT want to watch me eat! :eek: ).

It's taken me a long time to get to this point of being comfortable and proud of myself. And I find other husky and bearish men very attractive, as long as they are groomed and dressed well. Preferably with some solidness and muscle. There is a difference between a healthy and fit "bhh" (big handsome husband) and a slovenly fat guy who just stepped out of "Sloppy's T*tty Bar & Grill".

I work out too (weight train) pretty strenuously. I'm not a bodybuilder, never will be, don't want to be. I don't like the ripped look; give me some fat padding. I'm not a powerlifter only because never having competed I can't claim that title. However, I train like a powerlifter and look like one...

5'5"; 228-230 lbs; 17 1/2" neck, but for shirts I need to button the collar, they must be 18-18 1/2; 33 sleeve; 48-50 jacket; 42 waist; 26" thighs; 17" biceps, cold-flexed.

Yesterday my brother-in-law said "hey, you're getting fat". I said "Yeah I know, thanks. I've been trying to put on weight". He said "huh!?" I told him it was my lifting routine (a 5x5 bulk and strength routine). He shrugged and said "ohhhh-k!" I really have little intention of trying to lose my size, even my "bear belly". "Bear" as in Ursus arctos horribilis - Grizzly bear; not Budweiser, as some people misread.

As for finding clothes, this is one of the reasons I shop Men's Wearhouse. I also shop Casual Male XL. Yes, I find slacks with that extra "give" in the waist. My goal is actually to get to 240-250lbs and keep my waist to no more than 42-43". Unhealthy? Not really. Sure, I'm on metformin for insulin resistance (A1c is perfect @ 5.6 :icon_smile: ), and my blood lipids are always slightly out of whack, but it doesn't matter how much I weigh: it's always that way. One can be fat and fit (and I don't mind using the word "fat"). I don't run, but I mountain bike in season, and I like to walk.

I like being "husky"... "huskular". ;)
 
#31 ·
I border on big guy also. 5"10", 210 lbs. I better go out for a run.
Go for a run??? Think about your poor knees instead!! You can have a serious problem in the near future. Much better is mountain bike from this point of view.
Indeed. My sports chiro is not a fan of running for anyone. He recommends walking. I ran years ago. I even completed the 1998 Marine Corps Marathon @ 185 lbs. It didn't take long, however, to fall out of running as I began to gain weight. Knees and hips take a pounding @ 230 lbs.

Extra Long Bow ties to fit those 20" necks
And neckties. I usually find myself doing a Four-in-Hand (which I like anyway), because even a Half Windsor leaves too little of the narrow end to tuck into the loop or label.

I am not fat! I'm big boned.:icon_smile_big:
Nonsense! Thin is in, but fat is where it's at! :icon_smile_big:
 
#32 ·
Frank, I've seen your pictures and you are being quite modest! I would maybe describe you are burly or muscular, but I would certainly not think of you as being overweight, though. (I also cringe at the thought of wrestling with you or truly upsetting you. You're a big guy!!!)

(I could lift weights for 15 years and not get a third of your muscle.)

Your size does create some challenges in finding clothes, but you seem to find stuff that fits you and look good, at least from your pictures.
 
#33 ·
Frank, I've seen your pictures and you are being quite modest! I would maybe describe you are burly or muscular, but I would certainly not think of you as being overweight, though. (I also cringe at the thought of wrestling with you or truly upsetting you. You're a big guy!!!)

(I could lift weights for 15 years and not get a third of your muscle.)

Your size does create some challenges in finding clothes, but you seem to find stuff that fits you and look good, at least from your pictures.
By powerlifting physique standards, no, I'm not very overweight. ;)

Check your PM for some relatively recent pics. I won't post them here: one is in a very brief speedo, the other is in gym shorts, barechested. You'll notice some padding on me. :p Use your own discretion when and where you open them.

Side note... yes, even at my height I have scared some people.

1. A woman who ran a Yield sign and almost hit me got, well watch this and imagine a smaller version of the guy as me:

(work safe).

2. One day, without realizing what I had done, I was dressed in black sweatpants, a black mock turtleneck zip up shirt, dark blue nylon/poly windbreaker-type jacket, and a black baseball cap. At the mall I could not understand why I was getting nervous looks, as I stood outside stores waiting for my partner. I tended to lean up against the walls and cross my arms. When I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror I realized: "Oh! SWAT or Spec Ops" :icon_smile_big:
 
#34 ·
My sports chiro is not a fan of running for anyone. He recommends walking. I ran years ago. I even completed the 1998 Marine Corps Marathon @ 185 lbs. It didn't take long, however, to fall out of running as I began to gain weight. Knees and hips take a pounding @ 230 lbs.
Good advice.

I'm in the same boat; ran 4 marathons back when I weighed under 200, hurt a knee playing basketball, had surgery, and then got more into weight training; gave up running as weight went over 200. Tried to get back into it a few years ago, ran a couple of 20Ks, some 10-milers, and a slew of 10Ks, but it took too much of a toll on the knees.

I do like to walk, however. Last year, to add a bit of challenge, I started using a 16-lb weight belt I got online from Title Boxing, and sometimes will add a knapsack weighted to about 20 lbs.

If the weather is nice, I will walk about 4 miles w/ that, up and down hills in my neighborhood; if not so nice, I go up and down the 48 steps of my condo building for 10 to 15 circuits.
 
#36 ·
The weight belt and backpack are great ideas. Arm and/or ankle weights are horrible ideas. They can cause a lot of joint damage.
I had first acquired a 20-lb VersaFit belt from Power Systems, but it tends to slip down on my hips, so I use it to add a challenge to step-ups and lunges done with a medicine ball, rather than for long-range walking or extended stair-climbing. I was wearing it for dips, too, until elbow trouble forced me to lay off those:

The Title Boxing belt stays up where it should, however, around navel level. A very comfortable and well-designed piece of equipment. Handy for adding resistance to pullups, too:

https://store.titleboxing.com/adjustable-10-weight-belt.html

An added benefit of these belts is that they almost unconsciously force you to use good posture and keep your abs somewhat tensed in a kind of "plank" position where you are drawing your navel in towards your spine and standing tall, very good for the lower back and core.
 
#38 ·
Same boat (more or less) right down to the football.

No affiliation with any companies listed below. Very satisified with results though.

Suits/Odd Jackets/Pants: English American Tailoring (Actually a TJ factory outlet). https://www.englishamericanco.com/

Jeans: Diamond Gusset Jeans Best fitting jeans I've ever worn in my life. https://www.gussetclothing.com/bigmens.html

Belts: Look in Red Wing Stores (yes, the boot maker) across the US. You can occasionally be lucky. Also recommended on one of the on-line forums, but with no personal use yet, Leather Good Connection will custom make belts to your style, color and size. https://www.leathergoodsconnection.com/index.html

Long Ties: Have used in the past:
https://www.bigshotneckwear.com/
https://stores.ebay.com/JPaulBrentUSAFineSilkTiesCufflinks_W0QQcolZ4QQdirZ1QQfsubZQ2d33QQftidZ2QQtZkm

However, the quality in this size category is Sam Hober--the best place for highest quality ties. No competitors in quality in this class! I just wish he carried some wool ties as well. Long delay for delivery--but well worth it.

Wide Shoes: Mainly AE, some from Paul Minor (not AE's quality, but they fit.) Personally, I've gone bespoke and don't plan on looking back for dress shoes.

Over Coats: Only ones I can find that fit are custom-made by TJ

Underwear: I just loaded up on Jockey (Tall 3XL) T-Shirts, but they don't make shorts in my size. Jockey outlet store in Leesburg, VA.

Best On-line stores for Big Guys: Rochestor Clothing, Westport (seconded):aportnoy:

Best brick and mortar Big Guys store: Austins (Timonium, MD and Fairfax, VA) (seconded):aportnoy:
 
#39 · (Edited)
Gents,

First off let me say thank you for all the suggestions. Its pleasantly surprising to see more than a few men of size in here and learn of places they acquire clothing. Hopefully this will grow as time goes on as finding new sources is always a treat. Coming in at 6'5 and 260 pounds, I can indeed empathize in terms of searching for the "Grail" of quality off the rack items for those of us a bit larger than the societal norm.

For me its even a bit trickier with suits, as my ideal weight of 250 still has me in a 50-52 jacket but a 38 waist. It's made off the rack pert near impossible....it has however given me some justification for continuing to eat rather well, and not worry about the extra 2 inches on my mid section :icon_smile_big:

While I have not owned one of their suits, but have a couple sport coats and several shirts, Paul Frederick has increased their sizes dramatically over the past year. I have recently purchased a couple of sweaters, and for casual wear they are more than adequate, not to mention the pricing is very reasonable. Certainly worth looking at from time to time.
 
#41 ·
AE Belts in Big Sizes--Please Help

I have a Allen Edmonds belt size 52 to match a pair of Chili colored Cody's. I bought it through Tom James and paid a premium. It is a fantastic belt...really high quality, thick, flawless leather, and of course, matches the shoes perfectly. I own several other pairs of AE shoes and would like to buy matching belts. I do not see any provision on the AE website for big size or special order belts. In particular i am looking for Black Custom Calf, Merlot, and Walnut, all with brass buckles.

Where can I find such AE belts in my size without paying the TJ premium?

(I know...for those of you that can't resist...exercise, eat less, yada, yada, yada...just tell me where I can buy a size 52 AE belt, please.)
 
#42 ·
I have a Allen Edmonds belt size 52 to match a pair of Chili colored Cody's. I bought it through Tom James and paid a premium. It is a fantastic belt...really high quality, thick, flawless leather, and of course, matches the shoes perfectly. I own several other pairs of AE shoes and would like to buy matching belts. I do not see any provision on the AE website for big size or special order belts. In particular i am looking for Black Custom Calf, Merlot, and Walnut, all with brass buckles.

Where can I find such AE belts in my size without paying the TJ premium?

(I know...for those of you that can't resist...exercise, eat less, yada, yada, yada...just tell me where I can buy a size 52 AE belt, please.)
I just have to ask if you have contacted AE via email to ask how to get the larger size. Their customer service has been great.
 
#44 ·
So with a 56'' chest, and a 50'' waist...
You are actually quite lucky for a wide guy. When I was a 50" waist I had only about a 2 or 3" drop, which made me look like a tear drop. As I lose weight I get it all back around 38" and have a 44" chest.

Most likely you look more like a brick wall rather than a sack of wheat. You have some shape which can be well accentuated by properly tailored clothes. The horror of sack clothing is great if you have a wife, though... I find women fling toward me just on visual appeal when I have more fitted jackets on. While sack jackets make me fade into the wall paper.

Jeans: when I actually used to wear them: Dockers.

Some fat guys look good in hats but so many tend to wear these weirdo dinky-eccentric berets or porkpies which look like something from an old cartoon. The "paper cup on balloon" look is unflattering on nearly everyone.

CASUAL MALE XL is really a good store, or maybe it WAS a good store, because they started to go for more trendy looks that work on thinner men, but were cut for EXTREMELY obese people.... and look silly.

A fat guy in a basketball jersey--no. Who are you fooling?

When obese, I found sports jackets and button downs always helped. Bowling shirts and tees? Not a chance in hell.

BOW TIES--I think you can get really nice ties at BEAUTIES of VERMONT. I love 'em.
 
#45 ·
Big Guys

Stumbled onto your thread. I am glad you guys have found an avenue to share info. I am not a big guy, but I am a short guy, so I empathize with your desire to look good and be well dressed. Disregard those who poke fun, they are certainly not gentlemen. Color, fabric, cut and style will all have a positive or negative impact on how one looks. So big guys and short guys need to be aware of issues of style that improve our appearance. There are some good books available at the public library that talk about these issues. Anyway, have a good day gents!!
 
#46 ·
Go for a run??? Think about your poor knees instead!! You can have a serious problem in the near future. Much better is mountain bike from this point of view.
I had the same problem until I got the right running shoes. I went to a running store and they suggested that I get a shoe called "The Beast" made by Brooks. I am a big guy, 6'8" 285 and since wearing these shoes I have been able to run without any pain in my knees and ankles.
 
#48 ·
Wear What You Like

IMHO, corpulent clothing connoisseurs can pull-off all the same looks as pencil thin runway models provided their clothes fit them (save the recent trend of extremely tight fitting suits which I think make anyone look terrible). When I see a big guy walking down the street in clothes that fit him properly, they have a slimming effect and I think anything looks good. Big people get into trouble when they refuse to accept that they have outgrown their size. In this case, no clothing styles will make them look good.
 
#49 ·
As a big guy myself,

I can't stand anything that fits too snug. I don't wear any article of clothing that only fits if I have to hold my breath. Breathing is not an optional activity. I usually try to find a size up and then go to the tailor to get rid of the excess material so it fits without binding. That's when you get the compliments from the ladies.
 
#50 ·
Online Retailers

Can anyone suggest any online big and tall retailers?

My problem is that I am both big AND tall. Most stuff that is big enough is for shorter guys, and most stuff that is tall enough is for skinny guys. This means that I can't just go to the big and tall sections for department stores and the like.
 
#51 ·
I usually try to find a size up and then go to the tailor to get rid of the excess material so it fits without binding.
Words of wisdom! Nothing looks or feels worse than clothes which cause that "stuffed sausage" effect.

Or as bespoke tailor Thomas Mahon puts it:

"If you're in-between sizes, get the larger size and pay a high street alteration tailor £20-£30 to have it taken in or whatever. Don't fool yourself that just because it's a Hugo Boss or Armani it's a better fit than than the Marks & Spencer. Doesn't work that way. Forget the cost, just be honest with yourself."
 
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