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Pants Day! Two Song Parodies: "Let's Dance" by D. Bowie and "Could I Have This Dance" by A. Murray

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Recently I wrote a parody of "Modern Love," a song from David Bowie's 1983 album titled "Let's Dance." I figured I might as well do something with the title song from the album.

MY PANTS
(Sung to the tune of "Let's Dance" by David Bowie--the shorter single version, not the album version)

My pants
Let out the waist, Lou and hem them too.

My pants
Why don't you put in suspender buttons too

My fly
The zipper gets stuck sometimes

My fly
Give me a zipper that gently glides

If you say cuffs
I'll go with cuffs

If you say stand
I'll stand

Now Lou, my butt has grown
Had Christmas at mom's home
Peppermint bark, candy cane cake
Mom's a brilliant baker!

My pants

My pants
Lou please let out the seat

My pants
I had too much to eat

How long?
Can I have them in one week?

How much?
Will you take VISA, my Citibank VISA?

And if you say cuffs
I'll go with cuffs

And if you say stand
I'll stand

Now Lou, my butt has grown
Had Christmas at mom's home
Peppermint bark, candy cane cake
My mom's a brilliant baker!

My pants
Let out the waist, Lou and hem them too.

How much?
Will you take VISA, my Citibank VISA?

My pants
My pants
My pants pants pants pants pants pants


*********


Because it's "Pants Day" at Ask Andy, here is a bonus parody based on those useful garments. In 1980, Anne Murray had a big hit with a song called "Could I Have This Dance." (The song can be heard in the fine 1980 movie "Urban Cowboy" starring John Travolta and Debra Winger.) Some people think the song is saccharine--and they might have a point--but I still think it's pretty. It was written by Wayland Holyfield and Bob House.

"THEN I SPLIT MY PANTS"
(Sung to the tune of "Could I Have This Dance")

My niece just got married and at the reception
The band sure did know how to swing.
As I twirled to the tango, the rumba and cha-cha
I was the dancing king.

Then I split my pants, the whole back seam blew out
Yet I kept on dancing, high on a cloud
Spinning and swaying, I wowed the crowd
Yes I split my pants and the back seam blew out.

While leading my partner, I was so nimble
We both felt as light as air.
As we did calypso, and then flamenco,
I felt like Fred Astaire.

Yes I split my pants, the whole back seam blew out
Yet I kept on dancing, high on a cloud
Spinning and swaying, I wowed the crowd
Yes I split my pants and the back seam blew out.

When I split my pants, the whole back seam blew out
But that did not daunt me, up on that cloud
Since I'm a dandy, I felt quite proud:
When I split my pants, my Swiss boxers peeked out.
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^^Bravo!!!
Have you ever considered composing sartorial song lyrics as a day job? LOL, you are indeed very good at it! I find myself increasingly looking forward to your creations, each time I sign on to AAAC. ;)
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Paraphrasing the late, great Mr. Wilson from the Dennis The Menace series, "Great Scott Martha, methinks A Star Is Born!" ...perhaps? ;)
^^
Thank you, my friend, for this mornings smile! ;)
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