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... and when did they remove the apostrophe from British keyboards?

Apostrophes are okay, if youre, like, a grandfather.

But the more youthful, typographical forward way of keyboarding ignores the apostrophe. In so doing, the letters can be more closely fitted together, for a leaner, tighter-looking line of text. Semi-colons are also very 1970s, and are replaced by the dash. ("Dash" just sounds elemental and streamlined, whereas "semi-colon" sounds proctological and very 1980s.)

Capitalization and the use of complete sentences is also a baggy, out-of-date sort of writing. Sure, I write that way much of the time, but never if I'm at Starbucks, blogging about junk and stuff, because if some girl came over and looked over my shoulder to see what I was writing, I wouldnt want her to think I was, like, old. I mean, no matter how awesome the going out shirt Im wearing, or how short and tight my black jacket is, its the writing that draws in the honeys.
--
Michael